Trying to replace my disability….

More and more I realize that people who don’t have chronic pain, don’t “get” chronic pain.  Like the helpful people who suggest I try a painkiller for my debilitating, hallucinating, vomiting migraines.  Because, yeah… that never occurred to me.

I have reached the point where the crushed vertebra in my lower back press on the nerves to my leg almost constantly.  I can stand up for 10 minutes, at most before going numb and needing to sit down RIGHTFECKINGNOW!

I randomly fall over because my legs sometimes go numb without warning.

I also cannot sit down for very long, walk more than a short city block, or any combo of these without being laid up for days.  I go into town one day a week to do all the running around, usually begging a friend to drive me.

So a friend gets the dubious privilege of driving me all over town as I get more and more pain-filled, cranky, and visibly lame.  They can’t really help, and I rapidly get to the point of giving up and sitting down until my hubby can pick me up.  Added to this is the knowledge that that by the time I get home, I’ll be lucky to be able to walk to the washroom and I will be unable to do anything for the next two days.

I am on the third to last most potent painkiller my Dr can prescribe, and this will be my last refill.  It’s lost all effectiveness after less than 6 months.  I have tried both Lyrica and gabapentin to repair the nerve damage, both were ineffective.

So, my Dr and I applied for disability. Twenty pages of forms and months of waiting, to be told that “I just don’t understand why you can’t work in an office.”  DENIED.

Did you ever injure your back shoveling snow, or gardening, or something?  That white-hot-cold sheet of pain up your spine?  The nausea and dizziness?  Unable to move, lying there praying your hubby/ wife finds you before the snowplow goes by and buries you?  I get that at least once a day.  Sometimes, just shifting position on the couch, sometimes rolling over at night.  Now that will wake you up faster than the sound of a cat barfing in your bed.

On a bad day, say… the day after being in town, I will get it every fecking time I move.

So, yeah, I can be in town every day, moving from chair to walking, to standing in line for my lunch or coffee.  Walking in snow and over ice.  Walking up and down steps. Falling.  For about the same amount as the stupid disability cheque would be.

So, I tried to make and sell spice mixes because I can do that on my own time at my own speed.  But people expect a lot.  Is it organic?  Fair trade? Non-irradiated?  (Is that a thing?)  What it is, is $5 for 2oz/ 55g of hand blended, secret recipe spice mixes, with no fillers, salt, sugar, corn, wheat, soy, preservatives…  And free recipes to get you started.  It’s not even covering costs. (Laurie’s Ultimate Goods on Etsy and Facebook)

So, now I’m trying something else.  Linking to Amazon to get a small percent on any book ordered from my blog.  Good books, mostly homesteading and canning, some tools or gadgets that I love.  Both on .com and .ca.

I hope.  Right now I’ve got it set up at, but .com is being recalcitrant.  They want a US bank account.   I’ll let you know if they bow to logic.

In the meantime, I’m setting up a page to act as a store with the books/ gadgets I have and love.


Free ebooks!

From Preparing for SHTF

From Prepper Chicks

From ereading on the cheap (not prepper related but often great books)

From BookBub (same as above, but some are Kobo)

And my just discovered spiritual source of books!  Books are at the bottom of the page.

Kindle ebooks and a few notes

A Beginner’s Guide to Companion Planting

Canning Whoop-ass: a beginner’s guide to canning

Scientifically Proven Home Remedies

How to Keep a Garden Journal

100 Easy Recipes in Jars

Thanks to Preparing for SHTF


Today we are expecting thunderstorms and “severe weather”, possibly until saturday.  We are also expecting my Mom.  😀

I had hoped to take her around to the cool sights, like the 2 new superstores that opened up (both Asian), or to a local campground with a lake for swimming.  But I guess we’ll be spending the rest of the week on, teaching her to use amazon kindle apps, and making face creams, spice recipes, and canning shit.  Maybe redesigning my spice labels so I can open my Etsy store.  I’m eager to start selling my spice mixes.

Quality time with a woman I suspect has too few years left for my liking.  Of course, I’d like her to live forever.  She’s that awesome.  Even my friends love her, half her visit will be with my friends.  And it can’t possibly be long enough, 20 year would not be long enough.

Getting serious about GF and healthy storage

I have been posting the shopping spreadsheet every weekend, to very little comment, one way or the other.  It’s about 3 hours work to put up, so unless I hear otherwise, I’m dropping that idea.  Maybe I will just post the awesome sales, like the tomatoes for $0.39 /lb last fall.  I got 7 dozen 500ml jars of stewed tomatoes for $58.  Enough to last the winter and spring, and nothing in them but sea salt and tomatoes!

I think will soon be restarting my weekly sales sheet, but with a more stern eye to healthiness, GF, DF, etc.

Paleo Kids Snacks: free for limited time!

925 Ideas to help save money and get out of debt

GMO vs Sustainability

Free Kindle books

Today has a couple recipes, links thanks to Common Sense Homesteading.

I know I’m late on the shopping spreadsheet, but this has been a week from hell.  If I get any requests to do it, I’ll start on it.  But if no one cares, I’ll skip this week.  No awesome ‘must-have’ specials anyway.

And my mom arrives wednesday!  I wonder how long I can keep her?  My mom grew up on a farm in the ’40s, so I hope to squeeze her for canning, farming info and family history.  And squeeze her just because I love her so much!

Just Add Water; food storage cookbook

Planting Your 1st Veggie garden

How to sprout raw food

Healthy Dinners Under $3/ serving, probably a bit higher in Canada

Thanks to Preparing for SHTF for the links to

Bread recipes (GF and special diet)

GF Foccacia bread (

Buckwheat wraps (

GF English Muffins (

GF Naan bread (